I always write a review at the year end. I try to summarize how I have spent the year and what are my success/failure in this year. This review guides me to make correction for future years and helps me to achieve more. I try to to name the year in one word by summarizing the major events happened in that particular year. As 2022 was approaching in the final hours, I was thinking what to name the year. I could think of only one word “Grief” as I was mentally and emotionally distressed throughout the year due to loss of my Mother.
At the beginning of the year my mother left us and started her eternal journey (inna lillahe wa inna ilaihe rajiun). She was suffering from Cancer from 2020. She underwent through her medical treatment fighting cancer. by end of 2021 she was showing very slow progress. I ended 2021 with expectation that she would recover. But at the beginning of January 2022, her condition started to worsen. Each day passed and I could see her getting weaker and weaker everyday. It was really difficult for me when I could see her proceeding to her last days. In January 24, My mother fallen sick seriously that we need to admit her to hospital. As her condition was deteriorated she was moved to ICU. When she was transferred to ICU, I tried to comfort her for a while. After that I bid her farewell for the night. I never knew that would be last discussion I am going to have with her and my farewell for the night will be the farewell for life as she left us in the very next morning. I was traumatized, distressed and heartbroken. There is not enough words in the world to express how I felt. But I didn’t cry as I had to stay strong for my Father and rest of the family. She was berried in the evening at my native village.
It was hard for me to accept my mother’s death. It was hard for me when I couldn’t find her when I returned home everyday. At some point I felt reluctant to return home. In order to tackle my grief, I started to put more efforts to my work. Coincidentally my work pressure started to grow. I started to spend more and more time at my office. This helped to to overcome my sorrow a bit. Throughout the year I maintained this mindset. Except for my responsibilities at my Rotary club, I withdrew from most of my social gatherings and connections. I avoided my gatherings with my friends and family. Although this might have not been the right approach, but this gave me some time to get used to with new life without my mother.
During June, my father proposed to go to Mekkha for perform Umrah with my entire family. I also wanted to do the same. After much discussion with all the members and managing a favorable time for everyone, my entire family finalized the plan. Accordingly we all visited Saudi Arabia in October 2022 and performed Umrah Hajj. Apart from this there were no major event took place for me in 2022. I wrote a mid year review at the end of November where I noticed most of my resolution for 2022 was unachieved. I think this is time to have the final check of resolutions of 2022.
01. Have a vacation in a new place with my entire family.
[Checked. Went to Saudi Arabia with full family]
02. Be more connected with relatives and professional network.
[By end of the year, I had two big family gatherings. I think I was able to connect with all. Professionally I have increased my connection as well. So This is checked as well.]
03. Conduct training sessions/ professional discussion sessions.
[Checked. Facilitated international training sessions for Audit Seniors of EY India Practice.]
04. Read at least 15 books.
[I have read only 3 books in 2022. Much low from my expectations. This remained unchecked.]
05. Write at least 50 blogs.
[No done. I have written 8 blogs in total. Need to focus on writing. So many thing is to write on but really hard to get time. But I am writing blogs for my Rotary Club on regular basis. You may check them at my rotary club website.]
06. Have a tour riding bicycle.
[Not done. This was almost done. I was ready with my Cycle. I managed time. But the morning I plan to set out, it was raining hard. So Plan was discarded. I think nature didn’t want me to go on a cycle ride.]
07. Travel places within and outside country.
[Outside country, Checked! but within country, not done. Though If Chandpur is considered as within place, then yeah it is done. I don’t consider Chandpur as my travel place as it is my native district. Going there is like going home.]
08. Do and learn something new.
[No new skill was acquired. It was one of the unproductive years for me.]
09. Read Holy Quran at least once a week.
[Didn’t happen as planned. But I read and recited on regular interval. Need to improve the practice though.]
10. Make new investments.
[Couldn’t find a good investment opportunity. But made some investments in financial assets. ]
In summary, this year most of my resolution remains unchecked as I lost my focus this year after my mother’s death. I spent entire year to overcome my grief. Although my grief will not end till the end of my life but I plant to utilize my time more effectively and efficiently. In 2023 I plan to reawake myself.